So far I've been on four dates and I don't think I've done anything too embarrassing. I did come close to tears at one point but the tears stayed in my eyes so I think I saved it. At one point the phrase "willy nilly" came out of my mouth, I played it off I'm fairly certain. I mentioned my deep desire to be magic more than once but I'm pretty sure that's charming and cute. I made awkward eye-contact, gave hugs that lasted too long yet otherwise stayed strictly within my own personal space. I have lost my swagger. I'm not sure I ever had it but I'm pretty sure I did for a while and somewhere along the way I killed it. Shockingly it doesn't seem to matter. Which means there will be more dates in the future and even more weird awkwardness.
Do you know in high school I made out with all the boys I possibly could make out with? (Oh, I shared that charming tid-bit on a date. Probably best if you don't ask how that came up.) If the boy showed an interest in me, I would make out with them sometimes for hours at a time. Fully clothed, no funny business (ok, sometimes pg-13 rated funny business) making out. I guess it's not shocking that I'm not the girl I used to be in high school (thankfully) but I do miss a good make-out session.