I have a friend, who I met while I was his manager at 24 Hour Fitness, neither of us work there any longer but luckily our friendship has continued. Besides him making going to work worthwhile he has also sent me some of the most amazing texts I've ever read. I've saved almost all of them in case I ever need a laugh..but pretty soon I'm going to be getting a new phone.
So, I decided to put the texts online so that I can enjoy them for longer and so can everyone else. Most of the texts stand alone and need no explanation others I'll give a brief back story to.
We start all the way back in July 2008:

Fitness 24hours a day! Except on weekends, then they need to go somewhere else. I got stuff to do.

I never thought I'd have a job with a requirement of hourly dance parties. I think I'm officially brainwashed. (side note: that was only a requrement for him.)

did kyle show you the click click? (s.n.: we used to name the dance moves we created)
i knew it needed some work but i didn't want to hurt his feelings. he didn't even shake anything.
we can't hold it against him, how is he supposed to know if we don't teach him. let's just be encouraging for now, baby steps!

(About SYTYCD)
we should try out for next season! when mry murphy sees our shakes, we're gonna get our tickets to the hot tamale train!
toot toot! i love when her drinks kick in towards the end. my all time favorite was when she wasn't happy and said "that will get no scream from me tonight."

Ok I have to take a break from typing but will continue this later.