Just Jill: Ramblings

I have random things to say and none of them are particularly interesting or exciting but perhaps if I shove them all together in one post the end result will be something spectacular and wonderful. (Probably not, but here goes...)

A Pair to-go please.

Over the past year I've lost a little more than 20 pounds and while for the most part I love my new body there is one part that has gotten smaller than I would've hoped. Well, two parts to be exact. The boobs area and the booty area. The booty area I can sort of control by endless squats and lunges which helps but there really aren't any exercises to build up bigger boobs. Here's a fun tidbit: non of my actual bras fit anymore so instead I wear sports bras most of the time and they do nothing for my shape. For a while I considered the possibility of remedying this situation by an eventual boob job. I imagined myself with a "C" cup, traveling through life all happy and booby; I felt sure that was my future. However today as I was laying outside reading I suddenly didn't find my boobs quite so offensively tiny. In fact they looked downright adorable in their bikini, so for now I am giving up on the idea of finding a way to fund my boob dreams. (I'm not entirely sure why the internets need this story but....there it is I guess.)

Not a picture of my actual crush
but safer for the internets.

I have a crush on a boy and it has reignited the giddy, crazy, imaginative girl inside. It was crush at first sight. I used to be extremely boy crazy and even though I've been attempting for the past while to put myself out there and find someone new it hasn't worked out that well. I don't think all of it is to blame on the guys out there that I've met or spent time with, I think part of it was also my reluctance to really find possibility. A couple months ago I had some help from another cute boy and although that didn't work out I think that the blip did it's job and now boy crazy Jill is back. And even though I'm rusty and out of practice (with flirting. jeez get your minds out of the gutter), I'm feeling ready to shake off the dust and WORK IT! Watch out. Hopefully.

Me reading, not writing.

My writing journal and pencil.

I've started writing and reading more which, I believe, are related. I already did a lot of reading and would always lament the fact that I wasn't doing any writing of my own. Then one day I listened to a podcast about the process of keeping a writing journal and I realized I already have one of those, I just haven't used it in over a year. So I dug it out, found a pencil (because a pen just freaks me out), and started writing whatever came out. And, even though I haven't been writing every day I have at least been writing on a more regular basis and it makes me happy. The writing is not amazing but maybe there is something good in there somewhere and I'll be able to use it someday for something. I like the physical act of pencil on paper, and even though I enjoy typing out things on my computer (I love the sound the keys make) I feel more creative when I can see my crazy sloppy handwriting sliding across the pages.

Life has been really, really good. I have been happier, busier, fuller from veggies out of my garden (and also skinnier) than I have been in a very long time and I love it. Life? life is getting better and I have a feeling, a hope, that it's only getting started.

A few more photos from recent happy times in the life of "Just Jill"